Hi again! I hope you’ve joined me once more to continue our journey to create a balanced and fulﬁlling life.
Last time, we discussed drawing up your ‘Life’ in a 9-square grid, supporting you to make mindful choices of how to best optimise your time and energy to create the life you desire. Let’s build on that….
It is easy to let ourselves get out of balance, and ﬁnd that one or more of these 9 squares has become much bigger than its allotted portion; and generally when any area expands disproportionately, the ‘Me’ section shrinks to accommodate this.
We often seem to be conditioned that it is our role to be selﬂess and all-accommodating to the needs of others, that it is our duty to be on all the relevant committees, that it is our obligation to attend all family functions and social events hosted by friends and neighbours. Otherwise we are labelled as ‘selﬁsh’ or ‘self-centred’, and that is bad, right? Wrong! It is not called ‘self-centred’, it is called ‘self-preservation’! And that is a good thing.
Take a look at your 9-squares. Notice where the ‘Me’ square is: in the centre….and with good reason. As adults / parents / partners/ providers, we are the hub or co-hub of our family and our household. We must be mindful that when the ‘wheels fall oﬀ’ for us, this quite often results in a ripple-eﬀect throughout our home and family, and possibly our business and work colleagues as well. As the ‘driver’ of your own life, and possibly that of others around you, such as your partner, children or your staﬀ, it is important to ‘indulge’ in a moderate amount of so- called ‘selﬁshness’- a.k.a. self-preservation – in order to maintain the equilibrium of the bigger picture, not only for your own well-being, but also, often, for the greater good of those around you.
So the next time you are super-busy, and thus inclined to skip your gym session, decline an invitation for coﬀee or golf with friends, or not indulge in that rejuvenating hot bath (even for 10 minutes!), think again; it is these ‘little things’ that recharge our batteries, keep us in balance, and make the whole ‘chaos’ manageable and worthwhile. I’m not kidding, this is important. Remember a time when you felt overwhelmed and overloaded….chances are you’d eliminated all of the little snippets of ‘me’ time, which just exacerbates our sense of imbalance and loss of control, not to mention resentment and frustration. Clearly there needs to be common sense applied; this model does not justify excessive ‘down-time’ hence causing detriment to other areas of your life, but it does mean that when you are feeling under pressure, often the best thing to do is to take that quick bath or stop for a cuppa and sit in the sun with a magazine for even a few minutes….and allow the adrenaline to ease, and your mind to think clearly again. See you next time….